Earlier this month, Tinder released a video entitled "The Menprovement Initiative." You can see the video by clicking here. It condescendingly starts out by saying, "Most men are great. And then there are douche bags. They can be a real problem. These women are determined to solve it."
Let's examine the opening statement starting with, "Most men are great." Did that really need to be stated? Do they think all men think that women automatically label all guys as "jerks," "assholes," or "douche bags?" Having to say that is patronizing. If you are a good guy, you don't necessarily need reminding. I try to not let it bother me, but when women use it in their rejection of me, it does bother me. But if most men are "great" than why focus on the small number of men that are "douche bags."
"And then there are douche bags?" Did they think saying "most men are great" before "and then there are douche bags" was S-M-R-T? Thank you Captain Obvious. Were you trying to build to this announcement. This isn't some sort of revelation. We know "douche bags" exist. We don't need reminding of it. They do a good job of it themselves. Instead of focusing on such a small number of men, why not focus your energy on the larger number of men deemed "great" and getting women to attract those men instead of "douche bags."
"They can be a problem." *Crickets chirp* Thank you Captain Obvious. "Douche bags" being a problem isn't some new revelation. "Douche bags" have been a problem throughout history. They are only a problem if you let them. This video proves they let them be a problem because they don't want to admit that they are attracted to these
Finally, "these women are determined to solve it." Why do they deem that its their duty to fix these "douche bags?" If you don't publicly acknowledge their existence, than they sometimes go away. They are wasting their time looking for solutions to a problem that will always be there. The next generation will go through the same thing.
They bring in Whitney Cummings and deem her a "douche bag expert." The fact she openly admits to dating douches makes what she has to say null and void. She expressly deems a guy a douche for having calf implants. Maybe the guy is self-conscious about his calves. Is a guy not allowed to feel self-conscious? I'm sure these same women who make a guy feel like crap for changing something about himself would probably support another woman who got a breast enhancement for example. Why is it okay to shame males in this regard? It's not. It's not to say the guy isn't a douche. It is more that she was quick to deem him a douche without so much as saying anything else about him. Are we just supposed to take her word for it that he was a douche based on calf implants? You wouldn't dare call a female a "douche" or "shallow" for breast implants. This is just another bullshit double standard.
Are they putting Whitney Cummings on some sort of SJW feminist pedestal because they think she has some knowledge about "douche bags" that nobody else knows? She isn't the first to deal with those type of guys and won't be the last. She even jokes about her dating life in her comedy. If she is making jokes about it, is this some indirect self admittance that her dating life is a joke? Honestly, she is no better at dealing with "douche bags" than like minded females. If she was, she'd wouldn't continually date these type of men.
Introducing some virtual items to send to men is not going to change their douchy behavior or attitude. A virtual drink in the face isn't going to change someone. They are wasting their time focusing on that small percentage of men. This "initiative" is going to fail. If they want to be "douche bags" than they will be just that.
What they hope will happen is that these "douche bags" will turn into the "great" guys. They don't want to have to "settle" for a guy who is deemed "average." Basically, they are shallow. If they weren't, they wouldn't obsess over trying to fix the problem of "douche bags." It's proven there is a higher number of desirable women vs. desirable men on Tinder. They are too focused on trying to make the "douche bags" date-able because dating someone deemed average would be lowering their standards. Not everybody fits into a certain mold.
Addressing a problem is fine, but don't start off by giving us a backhanded compliment. That's a terrible way for people to listen and or take you seriously. Did these people forget that Tinder is for hook ups? A portion of your clientele are going to be "douche bags."
If the tables were turned, we'd be deemed sexist if you we called females "douche bags" or we had a "womenprovement" initiative. But the fact women are doing this to men is because they don't think they need improving as they feel they are "perfect." Honestly, that couldn't be further from the truth.
If women had good douche bag detectors like men, they would be able to spot "douche bags" a mile away like men. But the fact they don't is why they keep going for these type of men. Don't bitch, complain, or try "improve" them when you are a part of the problem.
Saying "sorry, not all women think this way" doesn't help when men are constantly demonized and vilified. I understand not all women think this way. It also seems irrelevant just like when guys say "not all men think like this." Women have painted men with the same brush. So because you've had bad experiences with a few guys or you've had this happen with a guy, they're actually going to assume all guys are the same. But when guys do it, it's not fair. Oh the irony. If the shoe fits. I never asked to be painted with the same brush just like a portion of the women didn't ask to be painted with the same brush. It's shitty. I know. Double standards in the dating game need to disappear. But they won't.