Frustrated

Don't you get frustrated at the fact that when you feel something that someone else you know does or has that they tell you something, but don't like it when you try to say the same thing? For instance, when I feel down or something I get told to "cheer up" or something. But when tell them to "cheer up," it seems to not be a good thing. I tell them that they told me to "cheer up," so that seems to make the situation better.

They say that they are hurt by something I said. They make me feel guilty for saying it and I've apologize for it. But I've never told them it that it hurts me when they say one thing, then say another. If I told them then they may say that I am making them feel guilty, but I could say they make me feel guilty. Sure I've said don't say one thing, then say another, but I've never said it hurts.

If I'm feeling down, something is bothering me, or something is on my mind they want me to talk about it. When it comes to them, I try to get them to talk about it, but they don't want to. Well, that is if they don't tell me that is. I maybe should tell them that they should tell me what's wrong because they would want me to talk. If I said I don't want to talk about it, they wouldn't accept that. So why should I accept when they don't want to talk?

I am blessed to have this person as a friend, but sometimes it's just frustrating that there might be this double standard there. I might have to be honest with them or this might keep happening. We are best friends and we should be able to each other everything which we do. But it's that sometimes they get in a mood and don't want to talk about it. If it wasn't for them, then I might still be in a funk. I've thanked them a lot for being there and I am thankful that they were. Sometimes I get frustrated that I just try to avoid the issue so I don't have to deal with it. That is not a good thing and I need to be more honest when them and myself.

It's Going To Be Weird

You might be wondering about the title of this post. But it's going to be weird and it's not that my best friend Amy is going to be away this weekend. It's the fact that for the first time since we really started hanging out, we will not be hanging out because she will be in Dinsmore and the lake near Dinsmore with her family. We always hang out and are close because we are best friends. We watch movies together, watch SmackDown! together, and just talk. I am actually watching SmackDown! without her for the first time in weeks.

Tomorrow I will be watching the Saskatchewan Roughrider game with some peeps at church on the big screen downstairs. The game starts at 7:30 and that will take of my evening. If she was in town, I would have watched the game with her.

I've told her I will miss her while she is gone, but we will only be able to text when she is on her way down. THERE IS NO SERVICE IN DINSMORE. UGH! It would make things easier if there was so we can text. She will be have a lot of texts from me when she gets into service.

Music

As some of you may know, I am a big lover of music. I know what I like and dislike when it comes to music. I am not one of those people who like one genre or one artist. I like a plethora of genres from rock to heavy metal to jazz to blues to folk to Christian rock and many others. I like a plethora of artists from Rush to Dream Theater to Andy McKee to Pomplamoose to Julia Nunes to Van Halen to Diana Krall and many others.

I have been more perceptive to songs in the last month or so. Even if it's a country song or an R&B song or a song from a genre that I particularly listen to all that much or even like. Sometimes the song just seems to fit how I'm thinking or feeling. For instance "Amazed" by Lonestar knows how I feel about a certain situation. It's just crazy how I can relate to songs these days. I mean, before I never paid attention to that as much. But now it's just this perceptiveness that has grown in me. Maybe it's my feelings coming out in a different way instead of just verbalizing it or writing it in a text message or whatnot.

Becoming more perceptive all started when I was in a funk last month. I've recognized this trait in me now and it has seemingly gotten stronger. As well, my love for music has grown as I have found songs outside of the genres and artists that I like which I never thought that would happen.

I guess it's odd how life works with music and teaching you things.

Saying Something

You know how when you want to say something that it sounds much better in your head when you are thinking about it. That's how I am feeling at this particular moment. I am wanting to say something to someone yet I am not sure how to exactly say it. Thinking about it, it just sounds way better then if I were to say it in someway.

It's not only saying it, it's also how they might react. I've been thinking that they might not react in the manner that I might think. But if it is something I am wanting to say, then what is stopping me? I shouldn't hesitate to say it. I am a bit hesitant to say it. It's also a nervousness in wanting to say it and a nervousness in the reaction.

I've been stalling for about a week on saying what I want to say. I don't even know why, but I guess it could be because of the reasons I previously stated. But I just need to suck it up and say it. I might be better off if I did.

First Win Of The Season

So the Canadian Football League (CFL) 2010 season kicked off yesterday with a double header. The first game saw the Saskatchewan Roughriders play host to the Montreal Allouettes. I predicted before that game started that we would win. Low and behold we did. Even though we were down going into the second half I told the Rider Nation on my Facebook to remain positive. There was the second half of the game still to go. Remaining positive worked as the game was forced into overtime.

Overtime came and we exchanged points. But we got a too many men on the field penalty. We looked distraught and looked like the game was done, but low and behold we managed to keep the win. It was awesome! What an amazing game for the Roughriders on Canada Day. 1-0 to start the season. Also, this is the third highest scoring game in history and I am proud to say that I witnessed it. 105 total points scored with the end score being 54-51 for the green and gold.

Our next victims are the British Columbia Lions. The Roughriders will be on the road for that game. That takes place on July 1oth at 8PM CST.